"I spend more time that I am comfortable watching gifs of Thatcher trying to stare a hole through Archie's Macbook screen."

Reaction of determined teenagers/viewers of illegal x-rated material to Cameron's proposed porn filters

"Look son! I'm doing 'the hacking'!"

"If I want to look at shitting dick nipples in the privacy of my own home then that is what shall very fucking well do."

Reaction of everybody else

Marks out of ten

"None. Stop being a turd."